Silly Inventions - They Just Keep Coming

I never cease to be amazed at the stuff I see advertised on TV. Do you know people are still trying to invent stuff? Now, it should be obvious to anyone that anything worth inventing has aready been invented. Well okay, that's what folks said at the beginning of the 20th century, but nobody listened. Well, now everything worthwhile HAS been invented. For sure this time! If you ever watch late night television, you'll know what I mean. That is, if you can force yourself to sit through the 20 minutes of commercials between five minutes of programming instead of going to the john or fixing one or several midnight snacks or vacuuming the popcorn out of the carpet.

This stuff has no business ever being invented. Maybe that's why you can't find these items in stores. Sometimes we in our house watch an ad and then look at each other and say in unison "That is so STUPID!" (Yes, this has really happened, and on more than one occasion.)

My theory is that this rash of stupid, useless inventions, is due to the commercials for inventors to hurry up and send in their ideas. Maybe they hurry too fast before they come to their senses and realize that the invention still needs a lot of work or was just a bad idea right from the start. In any case, what I think happens is people send in their invention ideas, then the people who receive them send them a reject letter (very bad idea, just forget about it, etc.) then claim the idea as their own. And it really IS a bad idea.

Or maybe it's because of the commercials that show these wonderful inventions that everyone now owns and loves, except the inventor never got rich because they "didn't - have - a - patent!" So, so sad.

The thing about these new innovations is that first the ad has to convince you that you need the item. A perfect example is the Pasta Express - just cook, strain, and drain! (Of course, first you have to boil the water in another container, then pour the boiling water into the Pasta Express.) Uh - it seems that I always cook, strain, and drain, only all in one pot. Now, I grant you I didn't go out and buy the SPECIAL pasta cooking pot with the little draining holes in the lid, and I thought that was a mistake, but now I know it was a good thing because it has ALREADY become obsolete with the birth of the Pasta Express! Yet, I'm old-fashioned I guess. I don't mind draaaagggging out the strainer and straaaaaining my spaghetti and then waaaaassshhhhing the strainer, which takes up an extra three or four seconds of my busy, busy schedule.

And speaking of spaghetti, did you know some genius invented a self-twirling spaghetti fork? Truly amazing! And suspiciously similar to the battery-operated Crest Spin Brush, come to think of it. So, can I say, "I rest my case," or does my reader need still further evidence? I mean, if you really insist on inventing something, why not take something mundane, yet useful, like office chairs and redesign them? Add more cushiness, for example, and maybe a pillow for all those long meetings, and a soft foot rest and maybe an insulated beverage holder.

In any case, I think the best way to go is to forget the stupid TV commercials (us viewers will just laugh at you anyway). Put your innovative new product on the Internet. You'll have a world-wide marketplace, and someone out there is bound to love your what-ever-it-is!!!